Uno, dos, tres, quattro, cinco, cinco, seis....

So this just occured to me...why did they leave "Pretty Fly for a White Guy" out of I Love the 90's?!?! They totally need to remake that show when I'm famous and can be on it and tell them how it's done!

What a shame...

I'm sorry, but Raven Symone just didn't grow up to be all that attractive...or talented...oops...

Because Joseph leaves me sweet little guilt trip ladden comments...

Now you're all stuck with an update!  Blame Joseph.

My parents are in Vegas for the week and my grandmother is driving me insane.  As I told Ronnie, if you ever have to watch a sibling to keep them from sneaking out of the house, just get my grandma to come over.  They'll never escape.  Despite the fact that I'm 19 years old with a driver's license, a job, and am perfectly capable of not only bathing myself but also preparing my own food, my grandmother has called me at least 12 times in all of two days.  Which, now that I think of it, isn't that unusual, but usually I can pawn her off on my mother.

Anyway, first she asked if I wanted to stay over her house while my parents were away.  Yeah Grandma, I'd love to stay at your tiny apartment and eat your really disgusting kosher meals while watching the game show network all day and going to sleep at 9 PM.  Or not.  She also put me into a panic this morning by calling and leaving a message from her doctor's office leaving the address and phone number and no other information, such as, why the hell was she leaving the address and phone number and no other information?!  Apparently, she thought I should know how to reach her should I need her.  Yeah.  'Cause she's definitely someone I feel will behave properly in an emergency situation.  Oh dear.

In other news, Harold and Kumar go to White Castle looks oddly hilarious.  Only because of Neil Patrick Harris' apparent love of strippers.  And comitting felonies.

Tee hee...Mr. Zuchini head....

A really badly written entry...sue me...

In list form because it's easier...
 
Friday:  WON $100 IN SLINGO!  Booyah biznitches (oh, I'm totally gonna get bitch slapped by that anonymous whoever). 
 
So sometime last week I bought a Slingo card at 7-11 as I usually do when I go there.  Except I forgot it in Josh's car so it just kinda sat in his glove compartment for awhile till I could remember to get it back (thus begins the theory that Josh's glove compartment has some kind of magical lotto ticket powers).  A day or so later I get it back (after Josh tried to trick me into thinking he scratched it off and won $250...and then when I actually won $100 he thought I was trying payback, haha), put the card in my purse, and promptly forget all about it for another couple of days.  Finally while waiting to go out on Friday night I pull out the Slingo card and a penny (which I lost track of...oops) and start scratchin'.  This is pretty much what happened next:
 
Robin: ::scratch scratch scratch::
Robin's Family: ::does whatever they're doing::
Robin:  ::scratch scratch...:: Hey!  ::screams really loud, jumps in the air, twirls around squealing:: I WON $100!!!
Robin's Family: Whaaaa? 
 
So that was pretty awesome.  Except that anytime I tell anyone about it they make me feel bad.  Bah.  I could have bought you all candy!  But you made me feel bad so...no candy...ha.
 
Saturday:  Frivolously spend a bunch of my winnings on new clothes and a birthday present.  But all clothes and birthday presents are awesome, so it's totally worth it.  Plus I was using pretty much free money to buy these things, plus got coupons!
 
That night I went to see Anchorman with Mari and Diane.  Was alright.  The fight scene is worth my seven bucks, seriously.  But here's what I found really funny.
 
Before the movie there was a preview for some new Josh Hartnett movie..now I don't care much for him..he's alright, but I don't swoon 'cause I kinda think he looks like he has too many bones in his face or something...or maybe he got in a fight and has some bad swelling...anyway, Mari adores him.  So as soon as the preview comes on Mari gasps, squeals, grabs my knee and squeaks out "Ee!  Josh Hartnett!"  And then she kept clutching my knee, which was kinda starting to hurt a little so I sorta nudged her away.  The preview ends and all is well and normal again.
 
Until the next preview comes on.  It's for a new movie called "The Grudge" starring Sarah Michelle Gellar.  As soon as I see her on screen I gasp, squeal, grab Mari's knee and squeek out, "Ee!!  Buffy!!!!".
 
Yes, I am obsessed.  No, I am not a lesbian.  Except with Mari.  And only when I'm drunk.  Or maybe just horny.
 
Sunday:  Spent the entire day in my jammies (did I just say jammies?) and slept way too much.  Hooray!
 
This is so badly written!  Ahh!  But the movie preview story had to be told before I completely forgot it...bye now.

Freedom of expression to a tee....

A few days ago I posted about New Jersey allowing gay couples to register for benefits. I got two comments in response. One of which was this (mind you, this comment uses a word or two I don't like using at all...unless I was British and wanted a cigarette...which is besides the point...)

That is truly disgusting. Why is it that the whole under 30 crowd in America is obsessed with faggots? Is it perhaps because your post-modern pliant minds got shaped like silly putty by the mass social re-engineering campaign going on within the media and the education camps? Is it because you look to shows such as "Friends" to be your shining beacon of ethics? Is it because for every hour you all have spent reading a book, you have spent ten more hours playing X box? Is it becuse the thought of having to walk a mile to get somewhere is a truly traumatic event? Is it because you need your cell-phones and computers like a baby needs the breast? Is it because you emulate true pussies like Eminem? Anything goes, right? It's all relative, right? There is no such thing as black or white, right or wrong, right? FUCKING DEAD WRONG! Two men married to each other is an unnatural abomination. Now before you spew out your predictable, sophomoric, pedantic, and knee-jerk response of calling me that superficial concoction of a word "homophobic," I'd suggest you quite thinking so hard about what tattoo to get next, pull up your jeans so I can't see your thong staring at me, learn how to use and enunciate properly the word "your" instead of "yo" and start really trying to be a woman instead of extending your adolescence for the next dozen or so years.

At first I wasn't sure if I should respond. It's possible this could just be a pranker who thinks I'll go around crying or screaming or something. Which would be just silly, because I have a temper, but I'm not stupid. Why should I get upset over someone I don't know being mean to me about something so controversial? Should I acknoweledge the things this person has said to me? Should I let this effect me in any way at all? Wouldn't that be like letting the terrorists win?!

But then I thought, the comment didn't really anger me and didn't really hurt me either, and what the hell, I have things to say and I want to say them.

First, I feel the need to correct a few assumptions made about me by this person (who went by "Anonymous", oh the shock).

1. a. First of all, let's get a few facts straight. I don't have an X Box, and I'm pretty sure I've never played on one. As a matter of fact, the only game system I've ever owned in my life is a Gameboy, and that was tossed aside after about three weeks. Books, however, cover my shelves, my night table, parts of my floor, and entire walls in most rooms of my house.
b. I walked home from school (which was about a mile away from my home) nearly every day from age 10 to age 17. I don't remember any of these times being traumatic. Except maybe the time when I was 11 and my best friend fell down on the way to school and skinner her knee badly enough that we had to turn back.
c. While I do spend a lot of time at my computer sometimes, there are other times when I am hardly on it at all. And as for my cell phone, the only reason I have one is so that my parents can stay in contact with me should there be an emergency.
d. I do not emulate Eminem at all. For one, if I emulated Eminem, I would hate gay people, wouldn't I? And also, I would never dye my hair that shade of neon...
e. "Enunciate" relates to speach, not writing. I was writing, therefore the use of "ennunciate" in this situation is incorrect.
f. You say that two men married to each other is "unnatural". Well technically, in my opinion, anyone married to each other is "unnatural". Marriage is a creation of man, not nature. Human beings are the only things in nature who have such an institution. Although other species of animal may mate for life (which many species do not), they do not "marry".
g. I do not have a tattoo and will not be getting a tattoo. For one, it is against my religion. Also, I don't like needles, and I wouldn't put something permenant on my skin that I wouldn't necessarily want there fifty years from now.
h. I'm sorry I can't prove this to you, but the jeans that I wear really aren't very low what so ever. You can ask my friends, if you'd like, who might tell you I more often than not have worn jeans that don't really show my body at all and wear them mostly for comfort.
i. I have worn thongs, but only on very rare occassions (such as not being able to do my laundry and running out of normal undewear) and usually only under clothing that no one would be able to see it without me wanting them to. And you most certainly would not be one of the people I choose to see my thong.
j. I am afraid you have made various incorrect assumptions about me, my beliefs, and my thoughts. For one, I would never call you a homophobe. The term "homophobe" would lead one to assume that one is scared of homosexuals. You don't seem scared of homosexuals, and if you are, I wouldn't make such an assumptions without knowing more about you. However, you do seem to rather dislike homosexuals. This does not make you homophobic at all. Simply hateful.
k. And finally, at the age of 19, I am a woman in every sense of the word, in biology and maturity. But considering the fact that you've already proven to know very little about me (see above), why should you for any reason realize that I'm a woman? Not that it really matters to me what you think. Obviously.

And now, I must go.

Oh, I forgot one thing.

l. In. YO. Face.

::cries::

I fell asleep with a headache at around 8:30 and no one woke me up! I missed I love the 90's, and dinner, and talking to people I really wanted to talk to. And my head still kinda hurts. Sigh. I'm going to go eat my cheerios now (the most annoying part of this is that I need to eat to take my medicine and I need to take my medicine or go through a work day being very dizzy and gross feeling). And my mom's still in Israel and I want her to come back now, please. I'm going to go eat and then maybe sleep. I very much need a hug.

...sigh...Fathers...

Yes, definitely time for my mom to come home. My dad has a bad habit of forgetting to get food anyone else will eat when he goes food shopping. The only Robin-eatable food he brought back this morning was bread and cheerios. And then when asked what he wants to do for dinner his response is "I'm just going to have a frozen dinner" (usually in my house "What do you want to do for dinner?" means "Let's figure out what to do so that everyone can have something to eat"). Le sigh. Peanut butter for dinner it is. Blech. Must go scrounge around kitchen.

In yo FACE, Bush!

New Jersey officially started registering gay couples yesterday! Hooray Jersey! South Orange was the first town in the state to do it at midnight last night. Yay!

Okay, but now how about letting them get married? That'd make Jersey even cooler. Apparently there's a bunch of couples working on a court case to try and make it legal here and hopefully the Jersey supreme court will vote for it.

Yay gay rights!

I <3 Carbs

I am so sick of all this low carb BS. Lemme see if I understand this...you can't eat bread, you can't eat fruit, and you can't eat dairy. What the fuck CAN you eat?! Are you allowed to drink water? There's no carbs in that, right?


And now I must go, there is a cat that needs my attention.

...Ooooh, we're half-way there....

I could actually write something but that takes, like....work...so here you go....

You Might be From New Jersey if?

you've been seriously injured at Action Park.

you know that the only people who call it "Joisey" are from New York(usually The Bronx)or Texas.

you don't think of citrus when people mention "The Oranges."

you know that it's called "Great Adventure," not "Six Flags."

you've ordered a hard roll with butter for breakfast.

you've known the way to Seaside Heights since you were seven.

you've eaten at a diner, when you were stoned or drunk, at 3 am.

whenever you park, there's a Camaro within three spots of you.

you remember that the "Two Guys" were from Harrison.

you know that the state isn't one big oil refinery.

at least three people in your family still love Bruce Springsteen, and you know what town Jon Bon Jovi is from.

you know what a "jug handle" is.

you know that a WaWa is a convenience store.

you know that the state isn't all farmland.

you know that it isnt "The Beach" in New Jersey - it's the shore, and you know that the road to the shore is "The Parkway" not "The Garden State Highway."

you know that "Piney" isn't referring to a tree.

even your school cafeteria made good Italian subs, and, you call it a "sub" not a "submarine sandwich" or worse yet, a "hoagie" or a "hero."

you remember the song from the Palisades Park commercials.

you know how to properly negotiate a Circle.

you knew that the last question had to do with driving.

you know that "Acme" is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros. creation.

you know that this is the only "New..." state that doesn't require "New" to identify it (like, try ...Mexico, ...York, ...Hampshire (doesn't work, does it?).

you only go to New York City for day trips, and you only call it "The City."

you consider a corned beef sandwich with lettuce and mayo a sacrilege.

in the 80's you wore your hair REALLY high. (wait, didn't everybody??)

you don't think "What exit" (do you live near?) is very funny.

you know that the real first "strip shopping center" in the country is Route 22.

you know that people from 609 area code are "a little different."

you know that no respectable New Jerseyan goes to Princeton - that's for out-of-staters.

the Jets-Giants game has started fights at your school or local bar.

you live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.

you can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town.

you refer to all highways and interstates by their numbers.

every year, you had at least one kid in your class named Tony.

you know where every "clip" shown in the Sopranos opening credits is.

you've gotten on the wrong highway trying to get out of Willowbrook Mall.

you've eaten a Boardwalk cheesesteak with vinegar fries.

you have a favorite Atlantic City casino.

you start planning for Memorial Day weekend in February
.
you've never pumped your own gas. (Chris) Took me forever to get this one...

you know how to navigate a circle while talking on a cell phone and smoking a Marlboro w/o using blinkers.

every 3 miles you drive there is a deserted mall.

most really nice homes have a gas station and a junk yard next door to them.

you never tell the truth about what state you're from when strangers ask you in a chatroom.

most of your cash is in dimes and quarters.

even after moving to California, you still carry a separate change purse full of quarters and dimes for tolls.

you learned to drive by backing out of your driveway onto a 50 MPH road.

you have the shop install lumps and dents into your fenders so others will know that you have the strength in convinction to change lanes.

you know where highway 9 is from that Bruce Springsteen song.